17 April 1977, Hogwarts

[lilium_evansiae]

"So, how'd it go?" Lily asks, as they make their way back to Gryffindor tower.

They've been at a brief, post-Easter-holidays meeting the Head Boy and Head Girl have held with the prefects, which can be summed up, Welcome back to Hogwarts. We really hope the two weeks away have dissipated the tensions that defined last term, but we're not counting on it. Good luck!

Remus frowns at her. "The meeting? You were there."

"Not the meeting, silly, your date. With Angela?"

"How d'you know I had a date with Angela?"

Lily looks at him and waits for realization to dawn.

"James," Remus says, when it does.

"That, and I heard Black talking to you about it on the train. So, how did it go?"

"It was nice," he says, after a moment. "I liked her. I had a good time, I think she did, too."

"Did you kiss her?"

"I fail to see how that's any of your business, Evans," Remus says, mock prefectorially.

"And a gentleman doesn't kiss and tell?"

"Exactly."

"Ah, so you did kiss her, then. Must have. Or there wouldn't be anything for you to not tell," Lily says, cheerfully. "Plus, you're blushing."

"I am not."

"Touch of the sun, then?"

"Yes."

"In a corridor?"

"Yes."

"At half nine at night?"

"Yes."

Lily laughs, and a second later, Remus joins in.

"Well, whether you kissed her or not, I'm glad you had a good time."

"Thank you. And thank you for your help the other afternoon."

"You're very welcome, Remus. So, are you going to see her again?"

Remus shakes his head. "I don't think so."

"Why not?"

He shrugs. "I don't know. Just ... we had a good, but not really a good enough time to ... "

"To try to keep something going long distance?" Lily asks.

"More or less."

Lily stops walking and studies him for a moment, debating. When he stops, too, and turns back to look at her, she asks, and "D'you want to talk about the more or the less?"

"There's nothing much to say, Lily. She's pretty and charming and I had a good time, but she's in London and I'm here, and she's a Muggle and I'm a Wizard. I don't see a lot of future, there."

"Can I ask you something that might be a bit rude?" Lily asks.

"If I said no, would it stop you?"

"Yeah, of course."

"Go ahead."

"Do ... d'you like girls, Remus?"

"What? Of course I do."

"Well, I'm not trying to offend you, it's just that I've known you for what, six years now? And I've never seen you so much as ask a girl to go to Hogsmeade with you. I can't even remember any real gossip or speculation about your fancying anyone. A couple of girls who fancy you, sure. But not the other way around. And I get that long distance is hard, and I get that the Muggle-Wizard thing is complicated, trust me, but ... I dunno. The way you said 'more or less' it just ... it made that sound like those were more excuses than reasons. And you are a -- "

"The word you're looking for is werewolf."

"Actually, I was thinking I would say bit of a catch, but -- "

"I'm really not."

"You're clever, you're kind, you're thoughtful, you're brave, you're resourceful, you're reasonably handsome -- "

"'Reasonably'?"

"Well, you're not James, but I'm a bit biased. All in all, though, you're a good bloke, Remus."

"And a werewolf."

"That's not who you are, though."

Remus' smile doesn't reach his eyes. "Yeah, it is." He hesitates, then nods toward the empty classroom behind them. And since Lily can see where this is not a conversation to have in a corridor, she nods, and then follows him in, pulling the door shut behind her.

It takes him a moment to start speaking again. "I've never told anyone."

"What d'you mean? You just told me."

"No, you already knew. You worked it out. James and Sirius and Peter worked it out. All I had to do was confirm it. Or even just not deny it. Telling someone would be ... I'm not sure I could. And I don't really need to invite any further scrutiny of the pattern. I mean, it is supposed to be a secret, after all. D'you think a girl I was going out with wouldn't notice?"

"No, she probably would. Unless you were dating someone incredibly thick, but I don't think that would make you very happy."

"Right. Besides, wouldn't exactly be fair to her, is it? Let her date a Dark Creature unawares."

"That's not what you are."

"Yeah, Lily, it is. Look, I know you mean well, and I know you're trying to reassure me that there's more to me than the wolf, but the thing is ... I know that. But it's still a part, a significant, immutable, inevitable part of who I am. I'm in Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them. I answered a question on my Defense Against the Dark Arts OWL about how to identify myself. Signs of a werewolf: he's sitting in my chair and he's wearing my clothes."

"Fine, it's part of you. But you know, Remus, you may find that there's a girl out there who would decide that the clever, thoughtful boy that's the rest of you is worth it. After all, James and Black and Peter, they've known for years, and as far as I can tell, there's not a damned thing on Earth they wouldn't do for you. They've decided the boy's more important than the wolf -- "

"Yes, and that's three more people than I ever thought would make that decision."

"But it doesn't mean that they're the only three who ever will. In fact, clever lad that you are, you should have spotted that there's at least one more person who feels that way, or I'd hardly be having this conversation with you."

Remus actually smiles. "What is it Cliona's fond of saying?"

"'Fair enough'."

"Right. Fair enough, then."

"Just think about it all, all right?"

"Fine. I'll think about it. But for now," Remus says, opening the door back to the corridor, "what I'm going to do is get you back to your boyfriend before he sends out search parties."

"Don't be ridiculous. James wouldn't send out search parties. He'd come looking himself."

"Probably with Sirius in tow."

"Can't have that," Lily says. "Besides, we've got class in the morning and I still need to unpack."

"Back to Gryffindor Tower posthaste, then," Remus says. "And, Lily?"

"Yeah?"

"Thank you."

Lily smiles. "Any time."